Looking forward to 2014: A What's On North guide

So, 2013 has been utterly exhausting from an entertainment point of view. Did you want good films? Boom – Gravity, Stoker, Only God Forgives. But what about albums? Bam – Yeezus by Kanye West, Pure Heroine by Lorde and Paramore by – well, guess. Arts? Loads. Theatre? Ha, tons!

So with 2014 now appearing unstoppably over the horizon, what's to look forward to? Well, our good selves at What's On North have listed three of the things that we're looking forward to most, from the world of telly, film, theatre and, in one case, terrifyingly nihilistic Glaswegian comedy. Enjoy!

Calum MacLeod

Joan Armatrading

On her previous visit to Inverness, veteran songwriter Joan Armatrading rocked The Ironworks, reminding us just how good she is at thrashing out a tune on an electric guitar. But at the age of 63 the St Kitts-born singer has announced 2014 will see her final major tour and instead of a full band show, the shows will be intimate and acoustic, making her Eden Court appearance on Sunday 19th October all the more special, and perhaps a final chance for her north fans to show Armatrading some love and affection.

Lord of The Flies

Choreographer Matthew Bourne shook up the dance world when he decided to replace his female chorus with all male swans for Swan Lake. His next show should be even more testosterone heavy with his adaptation of William Golding’s horrifying Lord of The Flies, which will also offer the chance for local men and lads to appear on stage beside the professionals when it comes to Eden Court from Wednesday 28th to Saturday 31st May.

Only Lovers Left Alive

There is something slightly otherworldly about Nairn’s resident Oscar winner Tilda Swinton, so casting her as a vampire in the latest movie from indie cinema darling Jim Jarmusch (Down By Law, Ghost Dog: Way of The Samurai) seems a pretty shrewd move. Tom Hiddleston, the real star of the Thor movies, plays her undead other half and a tasty cast includes John Hurt and Mia Wasikowska. Only Lovers Left Away steps into the light on 21st February.

Kyle Walker

Kanye West Continuing His Recorded Descent Into Lovecraftian Madness

I loved Yeezus, alright? Kanye's 2013 album was the best thing to happen to rap in years – all atonal electronic shrieks, caustic beats and an amazing lyrical mixture of profanity and profundity. That he's confirmed his return to the studio so soon after such a critically and commercially divisive LP may sound like a return to the drawing board, but actually this should not surprise. Kanye has a workaholic nature - after the 2007 smash hit Graduation, he returned a year later with 2008's much underappreciated gem “808s and Heartaches”. I'm excited. And so should you be.

Kanye West – Black Skinhead Live On SNL (warning, a bit of -despite the best efforts of the censors)naughty language ahoy

Peter Capaldi Confusing The Thick Of It Fans By Not Swearing

The Christmas special of Doctor Who introduced fans to Peter Capaldi in perhaps the best way possible - by having him complain about the colour of his kidneys, looking angry and generally being Peter Capaldi's favourite role (that is to say, a grumpy-looking Scotsman on the permanent verge of ripping somebody's face off). The new series of Doctor Who is due in Autumn and, with all eight hundred and seventy nine million plot threads tied up from the Smith era, it'll be great to see what he can do with the role. Let's just hope it isn't an OMNISHAMBLES, eh? Eh!? Oh, forget it.

Matt Smith's Regeneration Into Malcolm Tuck-uh, Peter Capaldi

Community Season 5 HOPEFULLY Coming To Britain

I hate America. They invent jazz, they have the Superbowl and, AND, they get the next season of Community, one of the funniest and most inventive comedies of the 21 Century, on January 2! January 2! When do we get it? TBA. If you haven't watched Community before, then you really have to look it up – it's utterly brilliant, the story of seven misfit students of the weirdest community college of all time that managed to poke fun at every meta concept of television in the process. But it's all not smart-alecky parodies, it's a perfect blend of cynicism and optimism. In fact, stop reading this. Now. Go watch it.

Community Season 1 Trailer (I don't want to spoil ANYTHING beyond this if you haven't seen it)

Margaret Chrystall

Though there's the thought of all the regular events like Belladrum Festival that give you a little summer thrill for 2014 on a cold January morning, it's good to have a couple of special potential five-star events shining ahead of you like a beacon through the dark nights.

Taking Care Of Elvis (Eden Court Empire Theatre on February 13) With an appearance on David Letterman and being crowned Worldwide Ultimate Elvis Tribute Artist, catching Ben Portsmouth performing a career's-worth of Presley classics seems like a great warm-up for Valentine's Day. You gotta love the King.

Ben Portsmouth 2012 in Memphis singing Suspicious Minds

Opera's not everyone's cup of tea, but the tragic story of deserted Japanese bride Cio-cio San in Puccini's Madama Butterfly (Eden Court Empire Theatre on June 5 and 7) has inspired everything from Miss Saigon to Malcolm McLaren's 1984 single Madame Butterfly which includes part of Cio-Cio San's heartbreaking soloaria, Un Bel Di (One Fine Day). Scottish Opera's production has Korean soprano Hye-Youn Lee - one of The Independent on Sunday’sfaces to watch in 2013 - and Anne Sophie Duprels (she appeared in Inverness in Manon back in 2009) sharing the role of Butterfly.

Hye-Youn Lee sings Un Bel Di from Madama Butterfly

Dangerous comedy and flawless sleight of hand magic from Jerry Sadowitz: Comedian, Musican, Psychopath (Eden Court Empire Theatre on March 28) the man who many say inspired Frankie Boyle's line of wince-makingly raw one-liners. On a mission to offend almost everyone and kicks the concept of PC into touch. Legend.

(NO CLIP: Jerry keeps removing them from YouTube. Imagine something shocking here.)

Pauline Burnett

Metronomy

Joseph Mount brings his alt-pop genius to I'm Aquarius with a beautiful video and the Devon band are set to embark on a new tour in 2014.

Royal Blood

Supporting Artic Monkeys at their huge Finsbury Park shows in May and a nomination for BBC Sound of 2014 award could mark the start of something massive for this unusual Brighton duo of Mike Keer on vocals and bass (playing guitar riffs on it like a man possessed) and Ben Thatcher on drums. Their sound is bigger than the sum of their parts.

Muppets Most Wanted

Ricky Gervais joins the Muppets on a Europe-hopping caper in the sequel to 2011's $165m grossing, Oscar winning comeback movie. Bring it on, Animal!